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My Next New Low

by Florence Wiley

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1.
Early riser moving out the trash Slipping on the mask Keep ahold of the thread Before it slips away Hold this moment In the stillness in between The dark, the screen And the whole world around me See my buried bodies Turn on the TV while I sleep I can't bear to hear myself think Buried desire hiding in the trash Waiting on the path Keep ahold of the thread Before La, lalala La La la La, lalala La, la la La, la La, la la La, lalala La La la Turn on the TV while I sleep I can't bear to hear myself think Why are my teeth crumbling in my dreams?
2.
Born in the year of the rat bastard Under the sign of the man With the overplayed hand Who kept moving the family Further and further west I'm trying to outrun the past Just like all the rest Do you wanna live forever? Do you wanna be alone? There's no such thing as fair That's just the way it goes A woman of 100 years, when asked, "What is your secret," at long last She said, "I never got married and I still love to dance" Then she blew out her candles And shrugged off the past and said "I don't wanna live forever but I don't wanna die alone and there's no such thing as fear oh, what a mighty illusion we've been sold but we all have our cross to bear and a row to hoe. But what do I know I'm just sitting here after all this time and all these years what do I know." I don't wanna live forever But I don't wanna be alone There's no more time to spare That's just the way it goes
3.
What a Dream 04:58
We open on a scene A sandcastle pail and the smell of bleach You can see the waves Breaking up and down the street of dreams Dangling their feet Come and carry me away Pretty please You can hear them say This could be my big big break All aboard my scheme I can be the bank and you can be the queen Let's create a craze Buy up all the haze and call it the new breeze Sell it to the base With an aging celebrity face Add a little sleaze The Black Friday pileup will make great TV Moguls and vultures are all that's left to be Pick the bones and clamor for the cream Comb the beaches roam the land And hope that some poncey Dauphin Will ask you for his hand to keep His business end clean Oh, what a dream Moguls and vultures are all that's left to be Pick the bones and clamor for the cream Come to Jesus on your knees And pray that some showy Dauphine Will ask you for your hand to keep Her business end bleached Oh, what a dream
4.
Suspended 05:38
Here we are shaking it off The old oblivion I just opened up the door And out ran my luck And just like that All the money's gone Just like that My mother's gone My, my how you've grown So, so very soft Can you even feel Can we just get along? Just like that Our love is gone Just like that Can you believe it? Just like that Suspended Every day feels like Sunday now Now we are dialed up to ten And there's nowhere to hide I just opened up the door And so, so close the sky And with such timing We've decided to Find ourselves Can you believe it? Just like that Suspended Every day feels like Sunday now
5.
I caught a light out The corner of my eye at 10:39 Friday night I heard your old ringtone And the red lights go off In my occipital lobe You dipped into an old flame out You passed by our old haunt And thought, "what he needs now Is to know that I'm drunk and alone and I put on our old song Say it isn't so" Now to think I'm just one more Former resident of the soft part of your heart One of these days now I'll get around to finally being alone And in my mind, oh The dead horse beat The picked and the picked over bones You thought I was weak But I hold my own Still you didn't have to go And ruin Hall & Oates I hate to think I'm just one more Former resident of the soft part of your heart One of these days now I'll get around to finding my next new low Yes it seems I'm just one more Former resident of the soft part of your heart One of these days now I'll get around to finally being alone
6.
I want nothing NOTHING And I'm never satisfied I want nothing NOTHING And I'm never satisfied Cuz with every spark And every burn The blackness returns When will I ever learn I wanna reach inside your heart And make you see That it's empty No you don't need any of these Pretty little things My friend, my man You can just be So burn your body of desire It's an inch deep and a mile wide In an apt use of your masochism And flare for the extreme Spill the blood of your idols And the blood of your dreams And in the clearing When the self is ablaze See the deep roots Of the deepest fake That I am you and you are me And that we all want to be free But we don't want to be free We wanna be amused We wanna be safe I wanna reach inside your heart And make you see That it's empty No you don't need anything to see My friend, my love You can just be
7.
Tiny Town 06:38
We are barreling down the freeway Past the shiny new Indian casino Into the past Into my old neighborhood at Christmas And I just can't bring myself To care that much about Who will carve up the turkey And set up the tiny town Or my mother regressing Oh, her agony at not having any grandchildren I couldn't wait to be so ashamed Or so proud Now that it's the former All I can do is hole up Just to keep from lashing out I am scared to know where you stand Because I may not forgive you And now I'm afraid That I may grow to love it To love my unforgiveness And to hate you for that And to love my hate for you for that Hold on to me You are all that's keeping me From bursting into flames She is getting older And trembling Trying to hold it all together Pictures in clay picture frames I made in the shape of a maple leaf When I was a boy And a terror But you can't tell that from the picture Now we hang it on a rotating imitation tree Shall we set up the inflatable Animatronic reindeer? That oughta show the neighbors They sat it all out this year Hold on to me You are all that's in between me And a rampage Now I'm at the table Making a garland of popcorn You are fashioning a Roaring 20s flapper hat From a paper plate And we're daydreaming of the soundtrack And the backroads of our next Great escape Where you will choose the direction And I will find the words "Love will find a way" Is something that I might say Hold on to me You are all that's keeping me From bursting into flames

credits

released July 27, 2021

Produced by Kevin Mock and Brad Waller
Mixed by Trevor Spencer
Mastered by David Hrivnak
Songs by Kevin Mock
Spielplatz Records Tacoma, WA



Big ups to the following...

A. Norris for living with these songs almost as long as I have
Sweet Teeth Bradley Keith for musical companionship
David Hrivnak for synth guidance and mastery
Trevor Spencer for kindness and professionalism
Jeremy Lynch and Nate Dybevik for your thoughtful playing
C&C for photos and old guitars
Carla Roveto for the surreptitious blind contour drawing of my mug

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Florence Wiley Tacoma, Washington

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